So there I was...about to start shooting the B/G scene with my discovery; a beautiful Chinese/Filipina college student ( don't bother e-mailing me since she will only perform in front of my camera for my various lines that I shoot for various studios) and a new kid;who I was trying out after he pestered me to give him a chance.He was perfectly hard for the production stills but when I spooled my vid cam up,started rolling and called "Action!" he got stage fright and went limp...I shut down my Canon GL2 and I asked the guy that lives at the location if there was any Viagra,Cialis or Levitra in the house...none...but he came out of the bathroom and said "Some porn actor left this here a week ago" and the guy was holding a small bottle of "AIM Woodsmen Formula".
Now...I've seen this stuff before at AIM;where they sell it, and thought "What a gimmick...clever marketing ploy".I would normally not trust it but I was beyond desperate to have the new kid get wood since the location $ is by the hour so I was willing to try almost ANYTHING,folks.It is a homeopathic and the ingredients listed were: Guarana, Yohimbe,something else (3 Latin words) and something else (2 Latin words) and it has an eye-dropper and the dosage is 1-2 teaspoons...I thought "The worse that can happen is nothing because the worse has happened already with his lack of wood". He took one teaspoon and made an ugly face upon tasting it. Curious, I took a sniff of it and it smelled like paint thinner mixed with honey...WEIRD so I look at the label again and it's written "50 % ETHANOL"!?
I am not exaggerating...20 minutes later the kids dick was pointing straight up like the staging light tree at Pomona Dragstrip ! He was revved up like an Indy 500 race car on ethanol and proceeded to f**k my Asian beauty like it was his last day to live! I am going down to AIM tomorrow and I don't care what it costs - I'm buying 4 bottles of this miracle formula and keep one in my camera bag and 3 in the refrigerator for future incidents.
...oh...I might keep one in the glove box in case I run out of gas and just need enough ethanol to make it to the gas station
Don "Asianman" Fernando
Updated on June 7th, 2006 at 6:05pm: It's pricey at $20 for a 5 fluid oz. bottle but it's better than spending $100 + in kill and/ or cancellation fees!
Modified on June 7th, 2006 at 6:09pm.
